Sunday, November 22, 2009

Helpfulness is Subjective

I wonder if it's ever occurred to my family that their comments about my marital status are unwanted. It seems my family has taken it upon themselves to remind me, at every opportunity apparently, that I lack both a husband and children. Last month my brother made me cry when so rudely pointed out my biological clock is ticking and I should really find a boyfriend soon if I ever hope to find kids.

Add to that my mother's new tactic. Each time I've seen dear ole mom in the past month, which has been more than normal, she's made comments about not having grandchildren, like I'm not aware or something. She throws out phrases like "If I ever have grandchildren some day..." and "If I had grandkids, I would..." and "You know, I'd really like to have grandkids at some point." It's almost as if she thinks saying these things is really going to speed along the process of finding Mr. Right, getting married, and having babies. I might understand her need to point out my failure to provide grandchildren, if I had been dating someone for a long time and was stalling a wedding. As it is, she's just making me mad.

If dealing with my mother's digs about my singleness wasn't enough, my grandpa weighed in on the situation tonight at my cousin's wedding. He informed me that the idea of me getting married is pretty much hopeless. He boldly stated he doesn't believe I'll get married in his lifetime. Furthermore, he anticipates my 19 year old cousin will be the next one to get married. Gee, thanks a million, Grandpa.

My older cousin, bless her heart, was much more positive when she mentioned my singleness. She did not badger me or reveal her doubts about my ability to make it to the altar. She actually asked me if I wanted to be the next one to get married and then encouraged me when I answered in the affirmative. Only if she could introduce me to Mr. Right would she be more helpful.

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